Lead Us Home – Part 2

On November 9, 2011 by Eddie

In the last post, I talked about the thoughts that led me to write the last song on the EP, Lead Us Home. It sounds very deep and heady, but I’d be really remiss if I didn’t tell you the reason why I can’t get through singing that song without crying…

In June of this year my family and I went to Florida for a Lighthouse Retreat. We’ve done this for several years now, and it’s one of the most life-changing events I’ve ever been a part of. Each year, the Lighthouse invites families from all over the country who are struggling through the battle of childhood cancer to come to the beach for a week of vacation. During that week the volunteers try to provide them with the most restful, enjoyable, memory-filled week they can imagine. We play games, sing songs, swim in the ocean and laugh a lot. For families who haven’t had a chance to laugh in years, it is a chance to catch their breath and enjoy life, even if just for a week.

Throughout the week we talk about how we believe that God is good, He cares, He is in control, and He wants to have a relationship with us. That’s easy for me to say to myself, but when I’m standing in front of a group of people whose children are literally fighting for their lives, it is much more difficult to comprehend. This summer we met a girl who was in the thick of a hard-fought battle with cancer. I won’t mention her name out of respect for her family, but I can see her face right now as I type this blog. She had the sweetest smile, and the memory of her dancing with her dad one night gets me choked up even now.

Needless to say, for that family, and for that girl specifically, it is really hard to believe that God is good. It is hard to understand that God is in control. Even for me, as I walked through the week, I found myself angry with God wondering how he could be in control and let something like that happen to such a sweet girl and incredible family. I still don’t totally understand it, and I don’t know that I ever will.

But what I can understand, and what can bring hope in a situation like that, is the faith that one day God will make it right. One day, somehow, God will take all of the pain that she and her family felt, combine it with all of the pain and heartache that we’ve experienced in our lifetimes, and weave it into something beautiful. I have no idea how anyone could even consider doing that, but it brings me to tears thinking about it. Think about all the pain you’ve experienced in life. This year I’ve seen marriages fall apart, lives come crumbling to the ground, businesses fail and financial security vanish. The pain has been really difficult to bear at times, but the thought that one day God could make it into something precious, perfect, beautiful – it astounds me. One day it will be made right. One day we will step back and go, “now I see…”

So when you hear me sing the bridge of this song, and my voice cracks a little bit— that’s not made up. That’s not a studio trick. That’s me, thinking of that little girl dancing with her father, clinging to the hope that one day all of her pain will be made right.

One Response to “Lead Us Home – Part 2”

  • Eddie this is powerful! Love your transparency in how you personally struggle(d) to balance God’s love and the suffering we experience/see. What an honest encouragement! Thanks for sharing.

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